This question wasn’t asked but I would love to ask for someone else.
Question: Are you the type that never spends time or money on the finer things in life?
Perhaps you have legitimate reasons why you do not. Not making enough money to spend on such luxuries. A loved one is sick or fragile and needs to be taken care of. No time available because of demanding deadlines and urgent projects. Debts are too large to think about non-essentials.
But what if you don’t have a legitimate excuse? What if you do make tons of money but choose to hoard it instead? What if your loved ones are healthy and independent but you only spend money on yourself? What if you have lots of time (if you watch about two hours of TV per night you should pay attention) but you don’t want to spend quality time with others?
Then I would say you’re a coward. I know this because I often struggle as one.
A coward is defined as someone who lacks courage. Courage is the one quality that enables you to face danger or pain and still move forward. Immense courage is required in loving others – especially when one feels stagnant, apathetic and conflicted.
What if there is rejection? What if things don’t go as planned? What if my thoughts and efforts are simply a waste of time? What happens if I get hurt? Everyone faces these struggles at some point in time. But these questions paralyze the coward.
Unfortunately, most cowards don’t even know they’re cowards. For example, I lived a life with my own standards and rules. I imposed these standards and rules on those who wanted to share life with me. But getting things my way only pushed them back. People want to be respected and cherished – not lectured or ordered around. It took me a long time to realize I was scared of giving power, time and energy to others. I wanted love but didn’t know how to love.
Love consists of many things. Two major components include truth and forgiveness. Truth sets you apart from the deception, manipulation and lies. Forgiveness sets you free from guilt and shame. Together, truth and forgiveness enable people to love each other. To build each other up and appreciate the journey together. Courage takes this love to an unconditional status and empowers you to live your life to its fullest.
So back to my original question. Are you the type that never spends time or money on the finer things in life? What if you don’t care for fine dining but your significant other does? Perhaps you believe expensive restaurants are complete ripoffs. Your girlfriend may never explicitly spell it out for you but she would like to be treated and respected differently on occasion. She wants to be cherished.
You may have your own ways to communicate your love for her but every individual has their own particular love language. She, like many other women, may respond more favorably from acts of service and quality time rather than physical touch or gifts. Acknowledge what excites her and take a bold, daring step in her direction. Bring your significant other to that nice restaurant she always wanted to experience. Show her you love her the way she yearns to be loved.
Such expensive generosity and thoughtfulness doesn’t have to be frequent. Just try it once! Do this with a smile and absolutely no complaining to ruin the romantic mood. Trust me, she will be grateful to know that you have the courage to love her more than she ever thought you could. To know that you gave up a little bit of yourself (the selfish part) for her. Don’t worry about the bill. This moment is priceless. She won’t forget. She will be inspired and invigorated to love you more. You’ll want to experience this again.
Cowards don’t take risks. They’re boring and forgettable. Courageous individuals go beyond expectations and are memorable. Be courageous. Live it up and share the experience.